Saturday, July 18, 2009

I'm Rubber, You're Glue....

All my life I've listened to what others think of me. Not the others who love me and actually know me. Know what's in my heart and who and what I am...No, those loving, compassionate voices are a whisper beside the shrieks of the few people who dislike me.

Now, I'm not everyone's cup of tea. I get that. I'm not the nicest girl in the world and I'm flaky and more than a bit lazy. But, I'm not cruel, and hurting someone, regardless of what they've done to me, hurts me. I don't like it when I know I've let my brain get ahead of my heart. Because my brain is quick and clever and has a tendency to lash out before I can "filter" what's going on.

It's time for a change, though. I need to stop listening to the things that people who don't like me say simply to hurt me. Generally speaking, the feeling is quite mutual. It's rare for me to want to befriend someone who doesn't want to befriend me. So, why on earth do I ignore the words of the people I love most, the people I admire and respect?

2 comments:

Archaeogoddess said...

Because, darling, we all want to be liked by everyone. And we worry that the people who like us already are possibly biased in their opinions while those who don't like us might not have those biases.

Which is bullshit, because obviously the people who don't like you are biased and in your case, are purposefully hurtful because they know it upsets you and that makes them feel better about themselves and their choices in life.

And for whatever reason, hurtful things said about oneself are much easier to accept than the nice stuff. I don't know why that is, but it does seem to be true (the ease of accepting bullshit from assholes, not the bullshit itself, in case that sentence reads misleadingly).

Lou Ann said...

Because, me dear, as you said, your brain (which controls your mouth and reactions)is quicker that the messages your heart and rational thinking sends...it's ok, that's who you are...and I for one wouldn't want you to change, but it does hurt to see you get hurt...